The Onion With A Golden Story: "NEW YORK—Major League Baseball commissioner Bud Selig announced a new policy on performance-enhancing substances Wednesday that is expected to help former slugger David Ortiz, currently batting a dismal .203, to come out of his slump and return as a league-leading batter. "We have amended the rules of the game to allow David [Ortiz] to use any performance enhancer he can find, as baseball is pretty boring when he's not hitting home runs," said Selig, who added that Ortiz could be suspended for 50 games under the new policy if drug tests show he is not taking any previously banned substances. "What David is doing right now is wrong, and this season could damage his reputation forever. The game of baseball needs him to do the responsible thing and superhumanly whack balls over the fence whenever possible." Moments after the announcement, Ortiz smashed through the conference doors with needles hanging from several different areas of his body and crushed Selig with a brutal thank-you hug, killing him instantly." [The Onion] (0)(8400)
Try To Read This Carmelo Anthony Comment Without Laughing: "Our confidence is we're good. This is exciting times. We're going home. We got a chance to win at home and see what happens in Game 7." Awesome grammar. (0)(8345)
|
It is hard to put into words how effective and important that Kobe Bryant was to the Los Angeles Lakers tonight. Denver Nuggets head coach George Karl said it best when he summarizing Kobe’s amazing run at the end of the first half. “No. 24 had a great five minutes at the end of [...] “NEW YORK—Major League Baseball commissioner Bud Selig announced a new policy on performance-enhancing substances Wednesday that is expected to help former slugger David Ortiz, currently batting a dismal .203, to come out of his slump and return as a league-leading batter. “We have amended the rules of the game to allow David [Ortiz] to [...] It’s an elimination game for the Denver Nuggets, so their confidence and emotions are already shot. This is when you see Kobe Bryant change into his Black Mamba suit and kill his opponents physically and mentally. I’m expecting to see the Mamba on the road after Bryant was a “decoy” in Game Five. “It’s [...] Orlando Magic center Dwight Howard is not happy with all of the calls LeBron James is getting from the refs, and he went on his blog to talk about it. Ya’ll can look at the TV and tell me what ya’ll saw. I’m straight up and down on that sixth foul against LeBron and [...] The Denver Post is reporting that the Colorado Rockies are going to fire manager Clint Hurdle today. The Rockies are currently 10 below five hundred and sit at the bottom of the NL West standings, 14.5 games behind the division leading Los Angeles Dodgers. It has only been two years since Hurdle lead his [...] A lot of buzz has been created around the possibility of Cleveland Cavalier star LeBron James leaving town if they end up losing their series against the Orlando Magic. People assume that LeBron thinks that if he doesn’t win in Cleveland this season that he won’t win a title as a Cavalier ever. Thus, [...] “Our confidence is we’re good. This is exciting times. We’re going home. We got a chance to win at home and see what happens in Game 7.” Awesome grammar. The University of Memphis is being accused of major violations by the NCAA that relate to their 2007-2008 season. The allegations center around a submitted SAT score that is thought to have been taken by someone other than the player that the scores represented. No names are mentioned in the letter to Memphis, but [...] |
     
Eastern Conference
Atlantic Division
Central Division
Southeast Division
Western Conference
Northwest Division
Pacific Division
Southwest Division
 |
|
Copyright © 2012 But The Game Is On - All Rights Reserved |
|